Here's an update from my stupid Facebook application. I should take it off, because it's just depressing now.
Someone bumped you down the ranking. They think you are 'sloppy'. (sorry, we don't share who - due to our privacy policy).
Anyway, it's not an isolated thing. I keep getting this notice. And if people on Facebook are noticing, that means things are REALLY bad. Usually I'm able to conceal my sloppiness pretty well. Now, lest you think that my opinion of myself hinges on what some random online thing rates me, I'll explain a bit more.I'm losing it.
I don't know what's wrong with me, but they're right. My house is sloppy, my kids are sloppy, I'm sloppy, my LIFE is sloppy. Yeah, you remember that optimistic artsy "word" I chose for my year? LIVE. Well, yeah, I seem to be having a harder time doing that than usual.
I don't want to sound all depressing and all and like I need a bunch of pity and whatnot. I don't need everyone reading this to comment and reassure me that I'm not sloppy. Because that's not in question. That's already answered. What I need is to hear, "Buck up. This will pass. Take an hour at a time and do your best to make that hour a success."
I don't know what it is. I think I'm just hitting major burnout. It's like I'm racing to this indefinable end that is always just a month away. Two kids, two puppies, med school, financial stress, babysitting (I'm so not ready for three yet!), SAA stuff (being on the board requires SO much time! Plus, of course I can't stop volunteering for things I don't have time or energy for), teaching yoga and kickboxing, doing the end of the year slideshow.... There is nothing left that keeps me going. Everything I'm doing right now is just draining my energy. Everything is just another obligation, another source of guilt for me. If I'm doing one thing, I feel guilty that I'm not doing something else. It makes no sense. I can be doing my budget and feel guilty for not cleaning the kitchen-- equally important, right? In fact, the budget's probably more so. And yet... The Guilt.
14 comments:
I'd tell you to just buck up and it'll all pass, but that sounds so lame. I'd also tell you to just drop stuff and remember that the sun will still rise tomorrow, but that sounds like something my mom would say. And I'd also tell you that you're not sloppy, but even if you are sloppy (which I don't know if you really are), it doesn't matter!! Nothing really matters!! For example, I'm going crazy with two kids now. Seriously, I don't know how people do it and keep it together. But does it matter that I don't have time to throw my friend the perfect baby shower? NO, because she understands and it's just a baby shower, not life or death. In fact, if I told her "I'm not throwing you one anymore!" I think we'd still be friends, and I'd survive. I don't know what else to say, but . . . I hear ya, sister. Good luck. Keep us posted. I think you need some red vines, yoohoo, and a hot bath. And a good pat on the back for essentially "keeping it together" where it really counts.
Girl, all I can say, is I know how you feel. Does it make you feel any better to know you're not the only one feeling "sloppy"/crazy/guilty/overwhelmed, etc.?
PS I haven't noticed your sloppines, so you're doing a good job hiding it
I am so sorry, the school year will end soon, and hopefully you will get a little relief. I am not sure what face book is, but I am sorry, to hear something like that would be hurtful. I think you are amazing, and you do so an amazing job at making it all look so effortless.
Hi. I lurk. But...
Everyone feels that way at one time or another. It's just life. It's okay and you're not alone.
Sheen, welcome to your final exam! It takes place for the rest of your life. What is it? The test of the balance act. Tough, tough and more tough stuff. Impossible even. Chin up and don't compare yourself to anyone. It's dangerous (besides, all seemingly perfect moms have sloppiness in their lives SOMEWHERE!)
Keep up the sloppy work (after all, sloppy work is better than no work, right!), and eat some chocolate.
Tasheena, I think you are amazing! You try so hard to do and be everything for everyone. Something, that I know I'd fall flat on my face for if I even attempted it. But since you want to hear this, I'll say it: Buck up! Things really will get better. No matter what, take time out to be close to the Lord and your family each day...even if it's for a minute... I know when I drop one or both of those things off my list, my day usually doesn't go very well, especially if I am swamped with things to do, or things to worry about in the future. If I do make time, everything else that hits me during the day is easier to bear. All I can say is, "Eternal perspective," my dear. Know that admire your desire to live a full life, and really look up to that quality in you. :)
apparently whoever wrote that doesnt know you..and we all have sloppy times that is just life.. if they were truly your friend they would look beyond that..I hardly believe you are sloppy maybe over scheduled with no breathing room.... so have your sloppy moment and enjoy it and then move on.... and remember your your friends love you no matter what
So I read your post as song in the background kept chanting, "All we can do is keep breathing." I laughed to myself because that is exactly what we need to do. I realized I'm never happy if I keep thinking about all I haven't done- and trust me my house is probably more sloppy than yours right now ;). Instead you're pretty amazing for accomplishing all you are doing. Your success or guilt depends on your outlook I guess. Regardless of how many commitments and tasks I have to do I've found if I put God first and take some time out for me (even just 5 minutes to think in the shower) things always just work out. You're amazing, and I hope I'm half the mom you are when I have kids. Yet, it's good to know that EVERYONE feels burned out at times. All we can do is just keep going. You got this, even if you feel that you don't. I know you do. Somehow you always thrive under pressure. Love ya.
Wow, you do hide it well. I look for the good in sloppy. I see creativity and vibrancy and a chance to try a little bit of everything.
As for guilt, today seems like that kind of a day for me since I am swimming in boxes, and BLOGGING. Very guilty. If you want my advice I say take a day off. A whole day!
If you need anything please let me know! I am more than happy to "play sit" or what is that that Avril says?? Plus, I can make an extra dinner for you a week if you need! Just let me know!
These feelings happen to the best of us, my dear. =) Read this talk by Pres. Hinckley: "To the Women of the Church" November 2003 - it's a good one. =)
Amen! I am right with you! Can't seem to get anything done. I could have written that post myself! I just keep hoping that one day, the energy will kick in and I will get up and get some work done! Even when I do actually get the laundry done, the dishes are stacked. Or when I get the floor vaccuumed, the bathroom is disgusting. One day, Tasheena, one day. I do need to take lessons from you though...I don't hide it very well.
I know how you feel!
I'm giving you a virtual hug right now... school, work, club activities, financial stress- We seem to be in the same boat. You'd probably feel better if I showed you a picture of my house...but I'm too embarrassed to share!
When the weather gets better... everything is more happy =o) Just pray for the weird April snow to go away.
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